It is time for me to share one of my pet peeves, and that is people that bring infants and toddlers to the movies. What is wrong with these people? Honestly.
Tell me if this has happened to you. You're in a movie theater, enjoying the movie when suddenly someone's kid starts crying. Instantly, your movie is ruined. Even the cry-free movie up until this moment is somehow ruined. The dad picks up his kid and proceeds to leave the theater and your thinking, "Good, maybe there's hope, as long as this person doesn't come back. Ever". Then the guy stops when he reaches the side of the theater and starts patting his kid on that back, because he doesn't want to miss the movie either. It's like, excuse me moron, but your kid's incessant whining is not blocking my view. It's EFFING LOUD AND I CAN'T HEAR THE MOVIE!!!. Moving to the side of the theater does NOTHING!!!!
Let me give you new parents a hefty dose of harsh reality. When you have a kid, your theater-going days are OVER! Finito. That's it. At least for a while anyway, or if you have a trustworthy baby sitter. Take your kid to the movies and everyone will hate you. I will hate you. Even if your kid doesn't make a sound the entire movie, I will still hate you. If you're thinking, "maybe if I jiggle them on my knee the whole time maybe he won't..." the answer is NO! And when he starts crying don't look at me with that stupid face that says "I can't help it" because you CAN help it by NOT bringing your freaking kid to the movies.
I know this news might be pretty disappointing to some of you. Well, I'm sorry. I probably didn't soften the blow either. Deal with it. There's hundreds of people in the movie theater that know the rules, which are don't ruin other people's experience. Bringing your whiny kid because you can't wait for the movie to come out on DVD violates those rules. Don't do it.
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